It is noteworthy that most college graduates do not attend classes in the art of living, and particularly not in the art of living with a spouse. Why then should we wonder when the divorce rates escalate and the marriage rates drop. Where is the course that teaches people how to stay happily married through thick and thin, the eternal bond that even death does not part?
Our sages taught that in looking for a spouse one should take particular care to look at her eyes. There is something about the look in a person's eyes — the light — that stays with him, from youth right through to old age. For, indeed, 'the eyes are mirrors of the soul', and the soul never changes. When two people identify that innermost part of each other's being and decide to merge their destinies based on that core, years passing by only make that wine mellow with age. So long as their marriage stays focused on that seed of goodness, sweet and eternal fruits will not be lacking.
When Avraham Avinu coureageously broke away from the decadence prevalent in his generation, Hashem saw in him something eternally special and in consequence, made an eternal covenant with him. When He saw similar tendencies in his descendants, Yitzchak and Yaakov, He refreshed this covenant to emphasize its renewed relevance. So strong was his love fo them, that when their descendants went down to Egypt and were subjugated and down-trodden, Hashem Himself expressed this covenant by taking them out of bondage and making them His eternally chosen people. Although they immediately sinned disgracefully, their chosenness was never marred, since their eternal goodness was not intrinsically blemished. Moshe Rabbeinu only needed to call Hashem's 'attention', so to speak, to their innate positive qualities to arouse Divine Compassion, but the relationship remained essentially unchanged. Just as true marriage starts with nuptial bleeding, so our marriage to the Almighty started with the breaking of the Holy Tablets and a temporary distancing, which was only meant to build the relationship on solid footing. The sin of the Golden Calf is recounted in the middle of the construction of the Tabernacle because it was an essential step in founding a healthy relationship between the Jewish People and the Almighty G d who rested in that holy abode. This ability to remain focused on the positive and overcome adversity is the essence of eternal happiness.
Adapted from Rabbi Vali's book on Shemos. Questions and subscriptions can be mailed to: the Yeshiva